So.. hi.

Ok, well.. you happen to be reading my very first blog. I'm sure you're incredibly honored (having sarcasm font here would be really awesome), but honestly.. I'm the type of person that will probably get a month down the road, read this post, and delete it because I think it sounds stupid. So... this might actually end up being my first deleted blog. I hope this doesn't ruin your experience here though.. don't be discouraged. I'm really not that boring. Am I rambling? Yes. Ok. This is why I hate leaving voicemails.. I will talk and talk, and usually repeat myself (i.e. - "Hey it's Haley.. just calling because I needed to remind you of this, and I was out and thought of it. So this is your reminder of this because such and such made me think of it.."), forget I'm not really talking to anyone, then realize it, and end the voicemail about as awkwardly ("ah, kbye") as it started. So feel priviledged if you receive a voicemail from me because they're rare.. and then please delete it. :)

..I'm rambling again.

But, to summarize for this moment in my life because after that rant, I'm sure you're like "what is she on?" - I'm actually in a really good place. Sometimes I can't help but think about how crazy it is with how things panned out so far, and I'm even more surprised about the people who have surprised me. We've all experienced some "lessons" and things have happened that have led us where we are, but really.. I'm so lucky. I used to be so down on myself and my life and I didn't enjoy things as much as I should've because I was focused on the wrong things. I'm so glad I've been able to bring the good stuff back into focus. I'm incredibly grateful for the people who have come and gone, and I've learned a lot from each of them. So every time I feel myself getting a little sad because things are so different than they once were, I just remember that it led me here and that I was lucky to have had those experiences to start with. I don't regret anything from the past... everything had its place and served its purpose. I just hope those involved are as understanding of it as I am. But that's all you can do I guess. One of my favorite movie quotes:

"Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life trying to overcome. That's what mama always says. She says that beginnings are scary, endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most. Try to remember that when you find yourself at a new beginning. Just give hope a chance to float up. And it will..."
[Hope Floats]

Wow - is this too deep for the first encounter? It's not often that I'm like "Hi, I'm Haley and this is how I interpret the happenings in my life." But I really do have these thoughts.. often lately. I think it will be a good therapy to actually "vent" them.. and I don't think that I'm that far off or that no one will relate. So.. maybe it will be an epiphany to some who just haven't realized it yet. I'm rambling again. Oh, and I'm really horrible at goodbyes.. incredibly awkward for me. I'm that person that is told to "enjoy your meal" or to "have a nice flight".. and I reply with "you too!" Yeah.. as if they get to participate as well. So then I feel like a jerk.. and then I go to correct it and by then, it's just a moot point because they're already off thinking "Man, I'm hungry" or "Well, a vacation would be nice.."

Hmph. Kbye.